Meaning of Trust 7, Obligation for Effort

[Ayelet1]

When I first listened to this class a few weeks ago, I think I must've read my notes about ten times (and slowly!) before the light started turning on. I summarized it and then summarized that, though I doubt it's perfect:

We have yearning for Hashem (Adam’s ruach for Hashem en sof). Hashem created the possibility of seeing His unity (Gan Eden, unification of four rivers), or having hiddeness, distance, and fragmentation (Gan without Eden, four rivers separated. A.k.a. nature), hence free choice to do leovdah veleshomrah. The purpose of leovdah veleshomrah and of mankind is our choosing to internalize the clarity of Hashem in the world (the proper action of hishtadlut makes bitachon awareness part of ourselves), and then the world will reflect Hashem, and His wisdom and will in a beautiful way (unity of four rivers, Gan Eden).

I have a question, or many questions that are probably all asking the same thing. If there was a possibility of free choice before the sin, why was the consequence of a bad choice so drastic? What were the two forbidden trees supposed to be to Adam? Why couldn't he just focus on choosing whether or not to uplift and guard, whatever that would mean? How did everything plummet so low in a situation where Hashem wants us to be winners? Why did Hashem create the first man in such a lofty setting but such a precarious state? Or was it not so precarious but really a terrible thing that he did? Is it our fault that we mostly lose the game, or did Hashem create things in that sort of way? It always seemed to me that Adam badly messed things up, though actually everything must be part of Hashem's plan, and be good. But how could a state where we're mostly losers be part of Hashem's plan?

Is it possible to forward this to Rebbetzin Heller? Thank you!

[miriam4]

I have a similar question about free choice. If our choices are equally weighted, why do we, statistically speaking, botch up more often than not? If the theoretical probability of us sinning is 50-50, why isn't that reflected in reality?

[Ayelet1]

How do we know that our chances of choosing between good and bad are 50-50, though?

[miriam4]

bechira chofshis - free will - by definition - means that the options are equally weighted